Im in love with the girl on tv

She sparkles like an angel

She smiles just for me

And though women try to tempt me

They need to understand that I'm a taken man

My heart belongs to another

I tracked her down and I went to her home

I climbed up to her window, and I found her alone

She was covered in the entrails of a sheep which she'd sacrificed to the snake god Glycon, to wake him from his sleep

Hooooly shit a new reign of terror has descended upon the earth

All hail Glycon the all powerful